Oh Goodness

So it's time to get my life in check. I'm starting with the biggest problem.
DongBangShinKi.
Now i know of 2 people right now who are making this face O_O
You know who you are.
I feel sometimes (even if i dont look or act like it) that my life is controlled by these men, these really good looking intangible men.
I once prayed for help if DBSK was something that i should be concerning my life with. The next day in my subscriptions box on YouTube was Colors~Melody and Harmony~. It had English subs so i was like OOKAY~~!
This is the first verse


Right now, somewhere, someone
is in pain, all alone
passing through a sleepless night
Until the light shines in your heart
lets nestle close together so we can sleep
like a melody and harmony in love.

So when i heard that i thought 'This isn't a coincidence. i must need to do this'

Well yesterday my dad said that i couldn't go on YouTube anymore and i had a break down. It was pathetic now that i think about it. But all i wanted to do was sit in the dark and wallow.
Thinking about it, that was scary. I do enjoy being alone sometimes but i don't think that i should've been alone then.
I told my dad i'd delete my YouTube account so that all the subscriptions and recommended for you wont be there. I think it's the right thing to do until i can balance my life. I did it with Anime, video games, twilight. this is just another phase and although its much worse, in my opinion, than anything i've ever liked i think it's time it starts to not be so dramatic.
So no more claiming JaeJoong Oppa (oppa is his title not a fangirl thing) as my husband. No more crying over the fact that he will marry someone other than me. No more indulging my nostalgia when I go places or do things that remind me of them. I still want to listen to their music though. K-pop is my favorite music. G-Dragon is my favorite right about now. So that wont stop just instead of the boiling it's doing now im just going to let it simmer.
Bad cooking reference.